A Love Story That Began at JIS

You never know where you might meet your future spouse. For Mia and Rob Livingston (Class of 1991), JIS played a big role in their love story. Though they crossed paths at school for just a year, the couple reconnected much later, in part thanks to the Alumni Newsletter. We reconnected with them at the JIS Reunion in San Francisco, where they happily live together on the outskirts of the city.

Rob spent his high school years in Jakarta, graduating from JIS in 1991, and Mia attended JIS for one year when she was 15, where the two crossed paths in 1988. Unbeknownst to them, the class they took together would end up setting the foundation for their eventual marriage. They met in Tom Rosevear’s English class, where the two remember debating one another about Tess of the d’Urbervilles — a conversation that Mia brought up at her wedding speech.

Rob: Our debate was about if Tess should have chosen a path of passion or of security. My opinion was security. But we were both wrong, as it turns out, you need both.

Mia: We also both had PE in Grade 10 and remember learning to waltz (which we did quite badly). We were very shy, our feet seemed huge, and we were clammy and clumsy. So, one of the first things we did when we got together 26 years later was go to couples dance class and learn to do it properly. It’s become one of our favorite things.

What is the story of how you reconnected?

Rob: In 2000, I had written an update in the JIS Alumni Newsletter about how I had moved to London. It was a paper newsletter, and you put your address at the bottom of it in case anybody wanted to get in touch. Mia was the only person who did. She said that she was in London, too, remembered me from class, and asked if I wanted to catch up. So, I called, we agreed to get together for lunch, and basically talked past each other since we were at such different stages in our lives. Then Facebook came along years later; we became Facebook friends and reconnected. 

Mia: Secretly, we’d always been each other’s “most admired” person. But true to our debate in Grade 10, I’d created a city-based life in the arts, while Rob was corporate and living in the suburbs. So, we continued to admire each other from a distance.

It wasn’t until years later, in their 40s, that by chance they found themselves exchanging more than 1,000 messages and emails discussing love, religion, the meaning of life, and debating concerns just as they had all those years ago. Rob flew to the United Kingdom to take her to lunch again to see how it would be in person, and she moved to Toronto to join him a few weeks later. The following year, they married in Nashville.

Did your time at JIS influence who you are today?

Rob: Of course, in the sense that it’s an international environment where you’re with classmates and friends of all sorts of different backgrounds and cultures. But also, because JIS is part of a really vibrant community in Jakarta. Just being part of that environment and learning how to do cross-cultural communication is incredibly important.

Mia: If I hadn’t gone, I think my life would’ve been really boring. I would never have dared to be as creative, take the risks that I did, or found the confidence to do anything. It was so much fun, both socially and academically. It was tough, but I had the time of my life. Just that one year made me feel like everything was possible.

What are your favorite memories from JIS?

Rob: Doing Model United Nations was incredible. Being involved in drama, IASAS, Cultural Convention, lots of intramural sports, hanging out with friends. I was Student Council President, and working on schoolwide projects was great. We started Battle of the Bands because we had air guitar back then, and one of my classmates complained that we should have real music for students, in addition to the Tolong Anak Anak (TAA) talent show. The teamwork inspired me to go for similar positions in the corporate world.

Mia: I loved just being on campus; that outdoorsy, humid, hanging-out-in-the-huts feel. I loved literature, art, and creative writing class, worked front and backstage in the theater, learned how to do the lighting and props. It all led directly to my work as a journalist and a dance producer in London.

What advice would you give to our current students?

Rob: Take advantage of everything academic and extracurricular that JIS has to offer. Drama, sports, intramural and varsity, volunteering, class trips — all of these things are incredible opportunities.

Mia: Take your own life seriously, and follow your passions... I wish I’d done that, instead of wasting years trying to please others. Try not to get stressed out about exam results. Do your best, but don’t get gray hairs over it. There just isn’t the time to get everything right anyway, and you can’t please everyone. So, take your time, and savor the things that will always matter, like joy and kindness.

If you could go back to one moment at JIS, what would it be?

Rob: Knowing what I know now, it would probably be English Literature class!